Healing from Chronic Pain

I am so passionate about helping women in the second half of life. At 45, my own thoughts about the second half of my life looked bleak.

On the outside, my life looked great. I had BFA in dance and was at the height of my career, choreographing on aerial equipment in a full-size theater in Hawaii. After years of struggling to make ends meet, my life was finally looking good. I was making more money than I ever had. As a single mom, I was able to comfortably support my daughters. The show I was directing that year was supported by an NEA grant. We danced to live music written for my choreography. I was feeling at the top of my game. 

But on the inside, I was living out a message that had been drilled into me.  I had been given the message that dancers in the second half of life lived with chronic joint pain, and I thought it would be how the rest of my life played out, because - I was living in chronic pain. 

My back was in constant inflammation, hot and stiff. The muscles of my neck and upper back were constantly seizing up, and my lower back felt like it was going to give out. It was harder and harder to dance and to choreograph. And right before our big NEA-supported show - the best show I would ever direct - I also got a debilitating case of pneumonia. The pain of that week, lying in bed coughing and trying to take care of my young daughter (who had bronchitis), is forever etched in my mind. 

My career was finally all making sense, but my body was giving out. Peter Levine, in his book Freedom from Pain, writes “that pain in and of itself becomes traumatizing.” After years of dancing with pain, I could relate. I knew that I needed a change.

This added emotional turmoil to my physical pain. I had been dancing since I was four years old. Dance was how I dealt with my emotions. It was my joy. I could never fully replace the happy hormones that it released in me. But, in order to heal myself, I made the decision to retire from my passion and my life’s work as a dancer and choreographer.

I needed to get out of the way of my healing.

I needed to create a different life and a new source of income.

I had to learn how to move in a way that healed my joints while supporting my core strength. I had to learn how to eat a nutrient-dense, non-inflammatory diet and deal with my digestive issues that were causing more inflammation. I needed to reinvent my life.

I became a personal trainer and yoga teacher. It wasn’t dance, but it was a source of income that eventually grew into a life path that I find a lot of satisfaction in. 

During the challenging years of working hard to recover my own body, getting rid of chronic pain, and finding a new life’s path, I also became a yoga therapist. It helped me to look at myself and my clients holistically. From my studies of yoga philosophy, and of research done on how to heal physically and emotionally, I began working to heal myself and my clients with my Five Points of Wellness--exercise, eating well, relaxation techniques, productive mental processing, and getting on a path of purpose. 

Within 2 years of leaving dance, I was able to move my body freely again without chronic pain. In my fifties, I was helping my husband Jim build his dream home. From using a pickaxe to break up soil, to helping him carrying heavy construction materials, all with zero chronic pain, I knew that I had beaten the odds of living the second half of my life in pain. 

When I am helping one of my clients work through pain, I always look at where there is an imbalance. Too much strength or not enough. Too much flexibility or not enough. Lack of relaxation. Lack of nutrient-dense food. I can help my clients learn new skills, or tweak some old ones they already have. These are the easier part of the healing process. But Peter Levine says that chronic pain can often be traced back to a specific incident such as an accident or abuse.

Addressing the emotional pain that comes with physical pain is the challenging part. Acknowledging that we might have leftover emotions from the incident that caused the pain, or that we might need to let go of the reason for the pain - like when I let go of my dance career - is the harder part of the healing process. Holding on to the physical pain might be easier than facing the emotional pain. Sometimes talk therapy is needed. Often mindfulness and awareness of the emotional pain, and a process to work through painful emotions, are required. 

Physical pain and emotional pain are part of this life. Our body’s ability to heal itself is also a part of this life. Being emotionally stuck in the traumas and disappointments of life can get in the way of that healing process.  

We can be present with our pain, access our intuition on how to heal, and get the support that we need to reinvent a life without pain. 

What I found for myself, and what I see for others, is that there is a NEW BEST JOURNEY beyond the pain, to be discovered, to be cultivated. We have more capacity than we know, and the journey of pain and getting out of pain teaches us about courage, resilience and that we have access to so much more than we ever thought possible.

So that is one of my stories about why I am passionate to help women in the second half of life. When I am able to teach the skills - the right exercise, eating an anti-inflammatory diet, focused relaxation, productive mental processing, and finding the right life’s path - I am in my happy zone. I have seen women find their truth and their happiness. I am so confident in this process.

I am dedicated to helping you find fulfillment and a strong purpose. Please sign up for a free Uplift Your Life Strategy Session with me. You deserve support, and I am here to help.